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About Me Member Fantasy Writer Jesse Hammond18/Male/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 1 Year
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Disclaimer: Unless you have a very large attention span, you may wish not to read the chapters of these stories all at once (with the possible exception of Ballad of Dreams). The length may be daunting at first glance, but not if you read it in pieces.

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I tend to browse randomly, browsing DeviantArt the way some people browse Google. Occasionally, I also get works from the Featured section. As a general rule, very rarely do I add more than one work from any artist to my favorites.

Chara Interview

Thu Sep 25, 2008, 8:19 PM
  • Listening to: Paranoimia
I found this while jumping around DA randomly, and thought I might do this little quiz thing.

I know this is probably breaking the rules, since I was not tagged and will not tag anyone, but… I’m a rebel.

1. Choose a few of your own characters. Five at the most.
2. Make them answer the following questions.
3. Then tag three people.
4. Feel free to go ahead and add some questions yourself!!
~~~

My choices:

1. My RP self
2. Draco Blazer
3. Sylver (robotic pet dog)
4. May Cottontail (Daughter of Peter Cottontail, Easter bunny)
5. Tristan (Shadow Wolf, think of a wolf, but green with white paws and a black tail, and stronger)

1. How old are you?
Joat: Fifteen
{Draco: Three. Yes, verons mature fast.}
)May: And I’m ten.(
[[Sylver: I haven’t had a birthday yet. I wonder if there’ll be cake.]]
>Tristan: Hm… I haven’t thought about it in a while. I tend not to worry about it, but my age is 19.<

2. What's your height?
Joat: About 2’8”.
{Draco: Vertical or horozontal? I am, after all, a quadroped.}
Joat: It is assumed to mean length, Draco.
{Draco: In that case, a little over a foot.}
)May: I’m 2’, average height for my race.(
>Tristan: I don’t measure myself. I’m a full-grown shadow wolf, same size as the normal wolf, and that should be a good enough answer.<
[[Sylver: You are 5’7”]]
>Tristan: I’m not going to ask how you know that…<
[[Sylver: Joat taught me how to tell lengths by looking! Oh, and I’m 4’1”.]]
Joat: Now we have the 411 on that 4-1.
{Draco: Booo…}

3. Are you a virgin?
)May: Pervert! What kind of question is that?(
{Draco: May and I are too young for that thing. And so is Joat.}
Joat: Then again, that doesn’t stop all people my age.
>Tristan: I have not yet met anyone I care for in such a way.<
[[Sylver: What’s a “virgin”?]]
)May: Moving on to the next question, now!(
[[Sylver: But…]]
)May: NOW!(

4. What's your favorite food?
Joat: BRAAAINS!
{Draco: Serious answer, Joat…}
Joat: Oh, fine. Christmas cookies.
{Draco: Chocolate. Especially that special extra-sweet chocolate May makes. Oh, pure bliss…}
)May: What can I say? It’s a family business.(
>Tristan: Meat, preferably uncooked.<
[[Sylver: I can’t eat, but I like smelling foods. I like the scent of lots of things. Like cake, apple pie, pizza… lotsa things!]]
Joat: Care to narrow that down to one?
[[Sylver: Oh, how could I decide? Well… I guess the apple pie.]]

5. What's your favorite ice cream flavor?
>Tristan: Pfft. I’m not much of an ice cream person, especially since Chutaca opened the portal to the ice cream pit. I do not like sticky fur…<
)May: Oh, you eat it just like the rest of us. You must have a favorite, right?(
>Tristan: *sigh* Fine. Vanilla, there. Happy?<
{Draco: I go for chocolate, myself.}
)May: Butterscotch.(
Joat: Mint chocolate chip.
[[Sylver: Please don’t make me choose…]]

6. Have you killed anyone?
)May: Do bad guys count?(
{Draco: In that case, we all have. Let’s just assume this question refers to those who are not bad, then.}
)May: Well… I’d prefer not to talk about that.(
{Draco: Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever actually dealt the finishing blow on ANYONE, evil or otherwise. I’m more defensive than offensive…}
>Tristan: I have killed many innocent people out of pure hatred. I am not proud of my past…<
Joat: No non-bads on the count for me.
[[Sylver: Not me, neither! I’d never do that! Never, ever, ever, ever, ev…]]
>Tristan: The audience gets the point.<
[[Sylver: *blushes* Sorry…]]

7. Do you hate anyone?
Joat: Spammers!
)May: Whoever made me… whoops, not wanting to say it.(
{Draco: I have no particular hatred for anyone at the moment.}
[[Sylver: Me? Hate? Well, maybe bad guys, but…]]
>Tristan: The wizard whom I once served during my days of hatred. I almost wish that he could come back to life, so I could kill him again…<

8. Have any secrets?
Joat: If I told you, I would have to kill you…
{Draco: Cut it out, Joat…}
Joat: My password, for one, is something I would wish to remain a secret.
{Draco: I have no secrets.}
>Tristan: As shameful as my past is, it is laid out to any who wishes to hear it. I bear no secrets.<
[[Sylver: What would I have to hide?]]
)May: Nothing secret to everyone, but something I’d rather not say on live journal entry.(
Joat: There goes the fourth wall…

9. Do you love anyone?
Joat: Not really.
>Tristan: As said, no.<
[[Sylver: I love Joat!]]
Joat: Wrong kind of love. You’re talking about ‘like’. They’re talking about ‘like like’.
[[Sylver: Like Likes? You mean like on the video games?]]
)May: Y’know, like romance.(
[[Sylver: Ohhh…]]
)May: Why, Draco, of course!(
{Draco: As strange as it sounds, yes, two different species of magical creatures can fall in love.}

10. What is your job?
Joat: Admin. Not of DA, of course. Oops… broke that there fourth wall again.
{Draco: You know, talking about it will just make it break further.}
Joat: *sweeps up the rubble of the fourth wall*
[[Sylver: I’m Joat’s pet!]]
{Draco: I’m his familiar. I know it’s odd for a warrior to have a familiar, but I’m back from when Joat resided in the Kingdom of Loathing.

11. What do you do to relax?
Joat: Online! Computers! Rah, rah, rah!
{Draco: Down, boy. In any case, I meditate.}
)May: I read my spellbooks, or look up at the clouds.(
>Tristan: I have no specific activity for that.<
[[Sylver: I curl up on Joat’s bed!]]

12. What are your goals?
Joat: Down with the spammers!
{Draco: To eliminate evil wherever it lurks.}
Joat: Um, that too…
>Tristan: To make up for my past by doing any good that I can. I do not wish to die with such evil on my conscience. Sylver has shown me that…<
)May: I wanna live up to my father.(
[[Sylver: I guess I just wanna have fun and make people happy and help my friends and do good things.]]

13. Are you envious of anyone?
Joat: Cleod and his well-developed forum board…
{Draco: I am happy with my state.}
[[Sylver: I wish I could eat…]]
)May: Whoever the head Qwertish Wizard is. Man, I’d love to have that kinda power…(
Tristan: I envy nobody. I have enough power already.

14. Do you have any family?
)May: Dad.(
{Draco: Does Joat count? I guess summoner would count…}
[[Sylver: Joat’s my dad! Well, sorta.]]
>Tristan: My mother and my father. That is the only information that will be worthwhile to our audience.<
Joat: My mother, a seal clubber, and my father, a disco bandit.

15. What's your favorite color?
Joat: Blue.
{Draco: Pink.}
)May: Orange.(
>Tristan: Purple.<
[[Sylver: Rainbows!]]
Joat: You need to choose [i]one[/i] color. Otherwise, I would have chosen plaid.
[[Sylver: Well, I guess blue, then.]]

16. Are you afraid of anything?
Joat: Needing a mage when one isn’t around.
[[Sylver: Having a critical hardware failure and never waking up afer going to sleep one night.]]
{Draco: The tie between Joat and I being severed. I do not know what will happen if that
bond is broken somehow.}
)May: A break-up.(
Tristan: I fear nothing.

17. What's your nationality?
Joat: We’re all from the dimension Randoma.
>Tristan: Actually, I am from the Void.<

18. Anything else you want to share?
[[Sylver: Hi, people across the fourth wall!]]
Joat: *shrugs* Well, what can ya do? When the fourth wall crumbles, walk the line…
{Draco: Thank you, Johnny Cash. Anyway, I guess it’s back to work, now.}
Joat: What work?
{Draco: That is to say, sleep.}
>Tristan: This was a change, I guess…<

deviantID

Jesse “Joat” Hammond
Gender: Male
Age: 18 (7/27/90)
About Draco: Draco is a veron, essentially a fire-breathing blink fox. He tends to be my anchor when I rant, or have any form of fun. His words are indicated in curly brackets. On message boards, or anywhere else that allows color, his words are also red.
To get a story from me: Not accepting commissions (no way to recieve the payments anyway) or requests. Trades on a case-by-case basis. The max capacity for trades is one at a time. And sometimes trades may be denied or postponed simply because I am too busy.

The max length for a story depends on what you are offering. Here is a rough estimate of what you will get for what you offer. Though countless other factors may influence it, here is roughly what you will get, in terms of story length (short being like Ballad of Dreams or smaller, and epic being like TGF or so):
- Story: Short
- Art (low-end, esp. a sketch): Short
- Art (high-end, color helps): Medium
- Art (masterwork detailed, colored): Long
- Animation (low-end): Short
- Animation (high-end): Long
- Animation (masterwork): Epic
- Interactive flash (low-end): Medium
- Interactive flash (high-end): Long to Epic
- Interactive flash (masterwork): Longer even than Epic
- Poetry: Likely a poem in return

Under no circumstances will I write about anything I deem to be fetishy or overly sexual in nature, especially if such a trait reigns above any real plot. A story loosely based on fetishy or sexual works is fine, as long as the story you are proposing as my part of the trade is not like that in itself. I bear no hatred against those types of works or the people who make them, I just would feel rather uncomfortable writing like that. Trade requests for stories containing overly gory scenes, to the point where gore becomes the whole point of the story, will also be rejected, for similar reasons.
Trade Slot: Vacancy

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Earth
  • Interests: Role-playing, coding... I guess I’m just a nerd lost in fantasy...
  • Favourite movie: UHF. (expecially the show ‘Conan the Librarian’)
  • Favourite band or musician: Apoptygma Berzerk
  • Favourite genre of music: Epic
  • Favourite artist: Dan Shive (I think he’s “Darkshive” on here)
  • Favourite poet or writer: Diane Duane (not on this service)
  • Favourite photographer: None, sorry
  • Operating System: Windows XP
  • MP3 player of choice: Oh, come on, now. This questionaire thing is getting ridiculous now.
  • Shell of choice: Um... seashell?
  • Wallpaper of choice: A picture of a fox I found from Wikipedia. (fixed a typo on this one)
  • Skin of choice: This thing has seperate skins?
  • Favourite game: DragonDaggers RPG, mainly because I’m the lead programmer on it.
  • Favourite gaming platform: PS1
  • Favourite cartoon character: Double-D. I wish I could get to his level of intelligence. As for his physique, I’ll pass...
  • Personal Quote: “Science is the new Magic.”
  • Tools of the Trade: When writing, the computer. When doing art, pencil and paper, a scanner, and PhotoShop.

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Comments


Hai!!!! :D

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I have Aspergers Syndrome, do you?
I greet thee. Nice to know thou’rt still in the known world.

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Signed,
That meddling fox, Joat

Accompanied by {Draco}, the veron (fire-breathing blink fox)
Which totally maketh thine sense..eth of course

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I have Aspergers Syndrome, do you?
I'm still here, I miss you man, I just wanna get the old group back together, I'm with people on the Artix Entertainment forums now but....I just want to see you, adam, everyone i knew again...

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I have Aspergers Syndrome, do you?
Thank you for the Fav :thumbsup:
Thanks for the fav. :)

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Mä olen mukava mies.
Thanks for the Fav.[link]
Joy

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If you like it it's good.
Thanks muchly for the favourite. =)

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